30 Dec 2013
Posted by Aliyah 
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I always like to ask ketubah artists what their advice is to couples choosing their ketubah. What’s most important? Color? Esthetic? Season? I have received such insightful advice I felt they deserved their own post. Here are some of my favorites.
“Choose a Ketubah and a text that speaks to you – as a couple. If the bride likes 10 different Ketubot and so does the groom, they should each choose their favorites, overlap them, see which ones are the same, then decide together which one they BOTH love. Each side has to be prepared to compromise. If the other doesn’t like a couple of the choices, so be it, let that one go. A couple can only have one Ketubah and it has to be one that both of them are satisfied with. The same goes for the text. Marriage is all about compromise, but if you are with the right partner, it should not be that difficult.”– Mickie Caspi 
“Each side has to be prepared to compromise.”
“When I meet a couple, I ask them to tell me about themselves, and how they describe their relationship. I also ask about their Jewish life. Obviously it is also important to get a feel for their style: modern, or traditional, realistic or abstract, bold colors or pastel. But at the core, I believe the magic happens when I can identify for the couple a Jewish/artistic way to capture and communicate what is important to them, in an abstract way.”
“Slow down. In addition to the art work that grabs the eye, you need to remember to take the time to read the text and find what speaks to them.”
“I don’t think a ketubah should try to portray the couple concretely, like the Ketubah I once saw with a stethoscope and scales of justice because the bride and groom were a doctor and lawyer.
The couple should take some time to reflect on what they want the ketubah to say about themselves, and then find a ketubah that they both love that expresses that essence.” – Baruch Sienna
“There is so much choice and couples don’t always realize that the English texts are different on every ketubah. It can get overwhelming but the text is such an important component. Slow down. In addition to the art work that grabs the eye, you need to remember to take the time to read the text and find what speaks to them. To their theology. Don’t compromise on that just to have a pretty picture on your wall. The words are what is really most important to the couple.” – Robert Saslow
